On Optimism and Creativity

This is the product of last night's movie night at Nana's. About 8 of us gathered to watch Harold and Maude, that old Ruth Gordon and Bud Post story about a deranged, suicidal youth who falls in love with a deranged, suicidal woman four times his age. I'd seen this movie for a film class in college, and all I remembered was hating it. I can't even remember now why the professor picked it.

I did enjoy it more now than I did back in college. Some of the gags made me laugh right out loud. But I also remember why I hated it. This notion that a boy who was born with almost everything should become obsessed with death and suicide because he wants even more -- well, I just wanted to slap him. Spoiled brat.

But there was a very subtle theme underlying parts of that movie, so subtle that I'm still not entirely sure it was deliberate. Both main characters have creative temperaments. Neither one has figured out a good method for channeling that creativity. Both are suicidal -- and both are very damaged people in need of a lot of therapy.

So I watched this, and knit half the cuff of the second cashmere mitten, and pondered all the ways stifled creative urges can muck up a creative person's head, and then I came home to this:






















Miss Seven, our first grade diva, has always had a thing for writing notes. Even before she could write actual letters, she would write me "notes" of all kinds, chicken scratches and swoops that neatly followed the lines on the page. When she learned her alphabet and could start writing actual notes, they were always these heartfelt (and occasionally heartbreakingly sweet) notes about how much she loves different people and animals. These were usually appended, "P.S. No Boys!"

Lately, she has taken to sprawling across various surfaces in my office and concentrating fiercely to come up with these notes. The postscripts are gone. She talks to me at length about how sometimes she doesn't know what she wants to write, or doesn't know the exact words she wants to use, but she still wants to write all the time. There is usually much pencil-sucking and harrumphing while she writes these days. She is clearly going through a creative growth cycle that includes a bit of blockage.

And I adore her for it, and of course will do everything in my power to encourage her -- I mean, listen to the rhythm in her fledgling poem, the child has an ear for language -- but my god. Another writer in the family. Poor kid has no idea what she's in for.

So I've been getting her some personalized notepads from vistaprint -- if you guys don't already know about vistaprint, you should get on their mailing list for their free offers. You can get really nice personalized notecards and the like for the price of shipping and handling, and the quality is fantastic. Anyway, I thought personalized notes would be a subtle way to encourage her to keep her creative channel open and flowing. After that movie last night, I'm really feeling committed to that particular mission!

Summer of Sleeves? Oh, Yeah

Apologies for the terrible pictures. For some reason, blogger gave me error messages every time I tried to upload the good picture, but it lets me load this fuzzy crappy picture with no problem. Thereby proving that blogger still hates me.

The sleeves are now 5 inches long, and they feel like they're knitting up quickly. Of course, that's probably because this is the narrow end of the sleeves. Once I get to full width, I'm sure they'll feel like they're taking forever. I'm in the third pattern repeat and each repeat is getting me about an inch. So my row gauge is off -- I'm supposed to get ten rows to the inch, but I'm getting twelve. I've decided I can live with this, even if it means my sleeve width will flare a little too quickly.

All things considered, though, I'd say week one of my personal summer of sleeves is off to a decent start!

:0

You know that damned crib blanket? Of course you do. That would be the PINK and green crib blanket I knit for my uncle and his wife, who were told they were having a baby girl.

Yeah. They had another ultrasound.

The doctors "can no longer determine" the baby's gender.

*thunk*

How I Spent My Holiday Weekend

I'm calling these the lightning bolt socks because of the way the white bits pooled down the leg. Very cool. And I'm trying really, really hard NOT to think about whether the second sock will look anything like this. I think we already know the answer to that one. ::grinds teeth::

The yarn is Sisu, and it has the loftiness of the knitpicks sock yarn without that hard crunch. The knitpicks sock yarn tore my hands to shreds. This Sisu did not, not even close. I'd describe it as a slightly crunchier Baby Ull -- same loftiness, same hand and finish, but not quite as soft. I knit it to a medium-tight density to try to counteract some of that loftiness so the sock will wear better.

Anyway, this was the perfect thing to work on this weekend. I could take a handful of antihistamines and still knit without worrying that I would screw up the pattern. It's a plain sock. What could be easier or more relaxing?

Baby Sleeves

This blue is so electric that it's hard to photograph. It confuses the camera!

Last night, I did my sleeve math for Fulmar and knit the rest of the cuffs. Oh, yeah, baby, knitting again. For those of you in the Fulmar KAL, I shortened the cuffs to 5 cm (she calls for 7), and I will be using Starmore's rate of increases for the first part of the pattern. That's the faster rate of increase, adding one stitch every three rows. By extending that rate further up the arm and delaying the switch to the slower rate of increase, the sleeve will hit the maximum width a little closer to the elbow. This will make it easier to modify the drop sleeve to remove some of the underarm bulk. I shortened the cuffs that little bit because I have short arms, and that's an easy way to shave off a half-inch in sleeve length.

I love this pattern so much. This might be my favorite knit of all time. The instructions are so clean and easy to follow that she turns the whole process into a magic trick. You see this complex and detailed pattern? Presto-change-o! It's a piece of cake!

And the yarn. swoon! Can you imagine what high grade merino feels like after crocheting 2000 yards of Encore?

I'm a very, very happy knitter right now. With great reluctance, I won't take Fulmar with me to the lake house today for the holiday weekend. Many children + smallish house + cold and rainy weather = bad for Fulmar. The cashmere mittens are staying home, too. A simple sock, that's what I need. And I will be ready to tackle those sleeves, full speed ahead, when I return.

Finished!

Today, the crib blanket!

Tomorrow, the foundation!!!

And then both the current pains in my neck will be gone! Woo hoo!

All I need to do is give the blanket a spin through the washer and dryer to set it -- killing the acrylic will go a long way towards softening this blanket up. And then I can wrap it and get back to the very important business of knitting.

I'm really excited about the return to knitting and can't decide what to pick up next. Fulmar's sleeves? A sock? Or one of the other many knits-in-progress? Ah, what a happy dilemma.

The Latest Meme

The rules: Are posted at the beginning. At the end of the post, the player then tags 6 people and posts their names, then goes to their blog and leaves a comment, letting them know they've been tagged and asking them to read your blog. Let the person who tagged you know when you've posted your answer.

1. What was I doing 10 years ago?
Practicing law. And this was back when the thrill of the courtroom was running through my veins. It was fun then. I had no life other than work, but that was okay. For a while.

2. What are 5 things on my to-do list today - not in any particular order?
1. Send out thank you cards for birthday gifts.
2. Call aol to yell about how they're still billing us for a service that was supposed to be free and was canceled immediately after the first time they billed us. (I hate aol.)
3. Finish editing one manuscript.
4. Harass some people who are past deadline.
5. Try not to go crazy from the noise in my basement.

3. Snacks I enjoy:
Chocolate anything, plus crunchy-salty things like popcorn or pretzels.

4. Places I've lived:
Minnesota, Indiana, Illinois, Texas, China.

5. Things I would do if I were a billionaire:
I would do as little as possible. Isn't that the point of money? It liberates you from all the crap you gotta do.

The Home Stretch

If you look closely, you will see a line of green double crochet stitches that represents the beginning of the blanket border. Oh, yeah, baby. The body is done. Time for the border.

I spent most of the weekend eating advil and drinking tea and working on the blanket in front of the television. The body measures between 28 and 29 inches wide, depending on how I smooth it out before measuring it. And depending on where I measure it. Let's just say that thanks to my unique gauge, it's about a quarter inch (maybe 3/8 inch) longer on one side. This, I can live with.

I'm ahead of schedule, thanks to two factors. First, the oh-so-delightful foundation repair crew made it impossible for me to do much besides crochet and cry last week. Second, Trish at Nana's Knits convinced me I could shave a couple inches off my planned width and still have a darn fine blanket. mwah, Trish! I do love the way your mind works!

So, the plan is to do a two-color border of alternating rows of single shells, but first I'm adding a single row of double crochets to stabilize the work at the sides. (Because I worked the blanket sideways, crocheting up and down the length instead of side to side across the width, the side of the raw work will actually be the top and bottom of the finished blanket. It needs a little more stability there.)

With luck and a healthy wrist, this thing could be done in the next few days, certainly by the end of the week. We'll see. My wrist aches and could very likely swell overnight. But I'm hoping if I sleep in the brace, it will be okay.

In any event, the end is in sight. This thing might actually be finished before the June 1 shower date. Imagine that! A gift done on time without having to lose sleep the night before the party! And -- oh, praise heaven -- I might be back to knitting as soon as this weekend! Woohoo!

My Week In Review

They jacked up the back corner of my house this week. The changes to the house are noticeable. Notice, for example, the way the doorframe has cracked. Notice the holes in the ceiling. That's something pressing down from the attic.





Notice the way the wall is separating from the ceiling,












And the way the doorframes are pulling apart.





And even the light switches are off-level now. Gee, I'm so glad they fixed the foundation. They tell me all repairs will be completed some time next week.







I just keep working on this and trying to ignore the way they vibrate the pictures right off of my walls. What's left of my walls, that is.

I'm near the 24" mark. Not quite there yet, but I've rented a couple of movies for this weekend and expect to add another inch or two before Monday. I'll be trying to play catch-up this weekend, too, on everything from work to sleep to sanity.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Yesterday was my birthday, and I splurged on five skeins of kid seta to make this:



And now all I can do is fondle it lovingly and wonder how long it would take to knit it -- surely not very long -- I could cast it on and see--

NO! BAD KNITTER!

Must. Finish. Crib blanket.

(sigh)

Whew!

Those of you who have had the misfortune of witnessing my crocheting in person this week will understand the significance of this picture. All week, I've been on a mission to get the crib blanket 20" wide. The shower is June 1. I have a deadline. <---- read that line in a voice of doom

I've carefully avoided my knitting needles while laboring through my eight inch goal for the week. I'd promised myself that once I made it to 15", I could take an hour or two for knitting, and I did. That was the halfway mark, and it deserved a little knitting reward in celebration. But then that left five inches of crochet with no hope of a break.

So Tuesday, I knit a bit, then switched back to the blanket.

Wednesday, I crocheted during my lunch break. Then I took it to my SnB meeting Wednesday night. Then Thursday afternoon for open knitting at Nana's. By that point, I was all the way to eighteen inches, and ready to cry.

Those people who talk about how fast crochet is? They're a bunch of damn liars. It's not fast. It's endless. There's a whole ring of hell full of people crocheting a king-sized bed blanket. They've been working on it for millenia. You can almost see the pattern now. That's how slow crochet is.

Or maybe it's just me.

Well, whatever. I made my twenty inch goal for the week. My new week with my new goal starts tomorrow. That means I can KNIT today. And thank God for that.

About a Book

A few days ago I finished a book called "The Knitting Circle" by Ann Hood. The book was beautifully written. The characters, all knitters, were compelling. The book pulsed with emotional intensity.

And I hated it.

I didn't start off hating it. At first, as the main character Mary discovers knitting as a way to cope with grief following the death of her 5-year-old daughter, I was moved to tears repeatedly. My heart broke for Mary. I wanted to keep reading because I knew her journey would carry her out of that deep pain and into a more positive place. I wanted her to get there.

She finds a knitting group at an area shop and learns to knit. At first, she does it just to get her mother off her back, as a way of proving that she's doing something besides crying all day. But then, the knitter's addiction kicks in, and she can't stop making scarves.

As she knits and learns new techniques, she finds opportunities to hear the stories of the other knitters -- their lives, how they became interested in knitting, that sort of thing. Each chapter focuses on another knitter in the group.

So here's how the book goes.
First knitter: deeply damaged individual who knits for the sake of her sanity.
Second knitter: deeply damaged individual who knits for the sake of her sanity.
Third knitter: deeply damaged individual who knits for the sake of her sanity.
Fourth knitter: deeply damaged individual who knits for the sake of her sanity.
Fifth knitter: deeply damaged individual who knits for the sake of her sanity.
Sixth knitter: deeply damaged individual who knits for the sake of her sanity.

Do I need to go on? Do you see the pattern? By the time I was at the midpoint of the book, I was waiting for one knitter to turn out to be well-adjusted, happy, coping with her life -- you know, something other than walking wounded.

Never happened.

Every last one of those characters was scarred and disturbed.

I get that the book was about grief. I get that. But did the author have to portray ALL knitters this way? Couldn't she have had ONE knitter who knit because she liked it, and not because she was hanging on to her sanity by the slimmest thread?

Also, there were errors in the knitting portions of the book. But that's a rant for another day.

I'm curious, though. If any of you read this book, were you troubled by the way knitters were portrayed? Granted, at least the author managed to avoid the old "knitting granny in a rocker" stereotype. I guess she gets points for that. But is this a new stereotype in the making -- the deeply damaged knitter?

We Interrupt This Blanket....

The baby blanket is at 15.5", so I'm past the halfway point. It'll be 30" or so wide through the body, and will pick up another inch or two on the border.

So I decided to give my wrist a rest and knit a little. I'd cast these socks on some time ago but didn't get very far, just the cuff and a smidge of the first pattern repeat. This is one of the Charlene Schurch patterns and the yarn is Dale Baby Ull, my perennial favorite for socks. I put in another hour or so on it to get as far as you see in this picture. Which isn't very far. But at least it's not dayglo acrylic crochet.

It's hard to knit right now. Honestly, it's hard to do much of anything right now. The foundation-repair dudes got over being quiet. They have this enormous drill doohicky and when they use it, the whole house vibrates. But I'm not complaining (much). I can already open a window that was wedged shut because of the foundation problem, and there's a nice breeze through my office today. The noise will stop eventually. Perhaps the pounding in my head will then follow.

I also sorted through some of my yarn stash today. And GUESS WHAT!!! I found a sock yarn bin with room for another 3 or 4 skeins of sock yarn, easy. And here I thought they were all jammed full to the brim. Heh. Take that, Guilty Conscience. It's not as bad as you keep trying to tell me.

The noisy drill dudes are leaving for the day now, which means I have a few hours of relative peace to try to get some actual work done. They promise to be back at seven tomorrow morning. No rush, guys. Really.

(cry)

This is my back yard today.






















This is my front yard as seen from my office window.









The men are very polite and quiet so far. There's some thumping and drilling and such, but nothing like what I had to listen to when the kitchen and bathrooms were under construction. It's disruptive, but not as bad as I anticipated. Of course, this is day one of a two-week project. There's still time for this to be annoying.

From what I gather, they may be ripping out the overgrown evergreens next to my front door in order to shore up the foundation there. Fine by me. But I'm worried about the flowering crab and the lilacs, both of which could be damaged in the process.

I haven't touched needles (or hook) in days while I've been off at a conference, so I don't have knitting news to report. But if ever there was a time to knit, this is it!